Week 29 --- Psalms 112:7-8

She will have no fear of bad news;
her heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord.
Her heart is secure, she will have no fear;
in the end she will look in triumph on her foes.

Every once in a while I get this need to make something. It's a need to be creative and I think it's a need to use my hands to craft something. I had a day off this week, where I felt like I was caught up enough on real-life things that I had some time to be the artist that gets put on the back burner a lot. I started with making a fabulous Cucumber-Mango Salsa, and ended with my living room looking like this :)

I like to put a huge drop cloth down over my living room floor and not worry about messes or dishes or laundry and just create. Usually once I start I have a hard time stopping and I start new projects before I finish old ones --- but I'm working on that.

I started a painting about 3 years ago that I finished today. It had so much life built up in it that I didn't want to dig it all up, but somehow decided today was the day. When I started this painting it was supposed to be a gift to someone. I would add sections to it as I had time and as I look at it now I can tell what life looked like during those periods. The top right corner was first, and looks happy and light to me, and ended up looking like sheet music, when I believe my original intent was more of a map like feel. The top left, larger section, I did in the days that I had off after the Westroads shooting. It came out looking so dark and scary that I put the painting away after that because I didn't like the direction it started to go.

I got the painting back out that summer after I spent time with the person I had planned to give it to --- I made it for his office for his new job and after spending a weekend with him I was ready to finish it and gift it away. I added the pieces at the bottom and included his picture in it and called it good. I was never quite ready to part with it though, and always delayed or made excuses about why it wasn't done yet. I also began to doubt whether or not the person was deserving of this art that had so much of my life accidently showing in it too.

A little background on art supplies. :) I put a lot of the mixed medium of this painting together with a polymer bonding agent. A bonding agent is similar to a glue in that it holds pieces together without harming the integrity of the original object. Another 'interesting' thing about a polymer agent is that it will never ever come off. I mean I suppose it could, but removing it would destroy whatever it was you were trying to make. The bottom line is those pictures on this painting, were not coming off.

I think there's some spiritual truths in that somewhere. There are things in our life that are there permanently. Memories or pasts, scars or relationships we embed them in our lives and then are left a little helpless when we want them to come off. We could peel and scrape and claw until we're left just as wounded as we were in the beginning and destroy the art that we could let Jesus create of our lives. That's the answer. And that's what I decided to do.

Some things just have to be covered by grace....

 

It's hard to make out the individual letters but I covered the area of the painting with pieces that spelled out Grace. It's still the same painting that still has a lot of me in it, but I'm learning to trust that Jesus is what makes me complete and his willingness to cover my sins with grace is something I need to accept and trust that he provides.

As I was finishing this up, a verse that I love kept running through my head. The painting still has such a musical feel to me, and I kept thinking of the phrase "I will teach you the rhythms of grace..." that I knew I had read somewhere.

 I looked it up and it was such a fitting and perfect summary of the experiences that brought me to the completion of this painting. I wrote it on the back so I wouldn't forget how it came together.

"Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."
Matthew 11:28





Do you just LOVE that? He'll teach us the unforced rhythms of grace. Oh I need to learn that! My verse this week was on trusting and having a heart that is secure. I started reading a book on insecurity this past week and I'll be excited to share some of the things I'm learning from that. 

I just love you girls that stop in to read this blog and I hope you all are doing well. :)

Praying for you, Beth